well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
ugly people sure do ruin things
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
