no. you can't hotbox the world.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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