I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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