Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize