why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
