New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize