Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Randomize
