I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
