Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
