We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
