Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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