Duck Duck Cougar?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
