im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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