i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Randomize