It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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