i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
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