he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
