I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
