Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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