True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
whose ass print is on the piano?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
