escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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