I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
