A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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