Define "chronic" masturbator.
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
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