So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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