Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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