Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
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