ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
