i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I currently don't understand fingers.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
