Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
