If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize