Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
