just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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