We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
