I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
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