I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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