Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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