every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
