we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
the raccoons are back...
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