doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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