I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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