Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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