It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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