What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize