Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
