is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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