it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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