party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
