Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
