If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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